I don't need this

mr_ed:  I was downstairs mucking with the laundry tonight, and when I came up I saw that somedoggy had barfed in the kitchen, the dining room, and just outside the garage.
Tucker:  I don't feel so good.
mr_ed:  Yes, and then I saw you barf in the living room. And you're drinking lots of water. Hey! Don't slap your muddy paws in the water bowl!
Tucker:  Don't yell at me. I feel icky.
mr_ed:  So don't take food from the neighbors. That's what you did, right? I saw pieces of steak and some vegetables, I think. Did you get that from the same neighbors who gave you guys the nice sharp leftover t-bones to chew on?
Tucker:  Wooo  I don't know.
mr_ed:  Hey, neighbors! Don't feed my dogs! They don't need it, I don't need it.


mr_ed:  Former Communist folk singer Pete Seeger, 88 years old, has written an anti-Stalin blues song.
Tucker:  Who?
mr_ed:  Who, who?
Tucker:  Stalin.
mr_ed:  Ahh, too much to go into right now, but Joesph Stalin, born Ioseb Besarionis Dze Jughashvili in his native language, controlled the Soviet Union from around 1930 until he died in 1953 and had millions upon millions of Soviet citizens killed in political purges.
Tucker:  That was a while ago.
mr_ed:  Yeah. Seeger dropped out of the Communist Party in 1950 and later said he was anti-Stalin, but he hadn't written anti-Commie songs the way he had previously written anti-war, pro-Commie, and whatever else.
Tucker:  Okay, so what?
mr_ed:  Exactly! Mr. Seeger, the world does not today need an anti-Stalin folk song! Good grief! After writing bombshells like "Where Have All the Flowers Gone", "If I Had a Hammer", and "Turn, Turn, Turn!" you flog a man who's been dead 50 years? How about an anti-Putin song? Anti-Stalin we don't need!


mr_ed:  This just in:

A joint statement issued Sunday by economic ministers from the 10-member Association of Southeast Asian Nations and China, at the end of their annual consultations, said product quality and food safety were common challenges faced by every country. All parties should actively cooperate in improving controls and ensuring quality, it added.
...
With growing numbers of countries rejecting Chinese goods, China has sought to reassure consumers by highlighting similar problems in other countries and criticizing foreign media for playing up the safety problems.

mr_ed:  THANK YOU CHINA !!! I am completely reassured by your rhetoric!
Tucker:  I'm not.
mr_ed:  Okay, I'm not either. I'm just being ironic.
Tucker:  Sarcastic.
mr_ed:  Whatever. We need better stuff, China, not better speeches!
Tucker:  Reports.
mr_ed:  Whatever.
Tucker:  Your aura doesn't look so good. I don't think I need to be exposed to it right now.
mr_ed:  Grrr
Tucker:  That's my line.
mr_ed:  Okay, you're right. It's Bedtime for Bonzo.
Tucker:  Wooo!
mr_ed:  G'night to you too, bunky.

TTIOT

mr_ed:  Giant spider webs.
Tucker:  Giant spiders?
mr_ed:  Nope. Bunch of itsy bitsy spiders.
Tucker:  Giant flies?
mr_ed:  Nope.
Tucker:  So what's the point?
mr_ed:  Lotsa flies, maybe, for one giant web.  People for the other.
Tucker:  Ick.


mr_ed:  Which image is "a sprawling spider web that blankets several trees, shrubs and the ground along a 200-yard stretch of trail in a North Texas park" ... and which is a human-sized cocoon made by bugs that suck out your moisture (as seen in the X-Files episode, "Darkness Falls")?
Tucker:  One picture has park rangers who aren't in a web.
mr_ed:  Okay....
Tucker:  And the other has a man getting caught in a web.
mr_ed:  Okay....
Tucker:  You have to make things harder for dogs as smart as Siberian Huskies.
mr_ed:  ::grin::  I guess so! Just remember, you saw it first on The X-Files !
Tucker:  I didn't. That was 13 years ago, before I was born.
mr_ed:  Wow. It's unbelievable how time flies.
Tucker:  Until it's caught in a giant spider web.
mr_ed:  Right you are. And remember, The Truth Is Out There !
Tucker:  And Sibes will dig until we get to the bottom of it!

Two years later

mr_ed:  It's hard to know what to think or say about the Hurricane Katrina disaster, even with two years' perspective.

I was going to pull info from different articles and try to come up with an overall view. To heck with that. Not only is it late at night (again), but anybody can surf a little and drown in information and retrospectives.

Just one item. Years ago, Brown University's Robert Kates came up with a rule of thumb for the time required to recover from a disaster. His Rule of Ten says you multiply the time that a place was uninhabitable by 10, and that's how long is needed just to function again. For New Orleans that's 8 weeks and 80 weeks.

If you count from 8/29/05, 80 weeks came in mid-March of this year. If you start 8 weeks later (and the article doesn't say which you do), then it was 80 weeks in early May.

But to totally rebuild? Multiply that by 10 once more - 15 years and a few months.

Katrina dog Pearl at MaxFund

I spent some time Wednesday at the MaxFund animal shelter, where we still have at least one animal rescued from Hurricane Katrina. Pearl had emotional as well as physical problems when she arrived, and she still seems to have a scary reputation.

But when I go to her kennel, she wags her tail and tips up her head so the chain slides right on. As far as I can tell, she's a sweetheart now. But for some reason Pearl still seems to look like a Rottweiler   ;-)   and that would make her hard to adopt out even without the reluctance that shelter people show toward her.

I wish I knew how to help besides trying to see that she doesn't forget about an outside world.

-- photo of Pearl by Nicole Howard

Soon, only two

mr_ed:  Last night's blog was a fiasco. It was late and I just wanted to write a little bit, and instead it took me ... I'm not even going to say because nobody would believe me except you, and you can't tell time.
Tucker:  I know you got started late. Because you came home late. Again. Why?
mr_ed:  You may remember that you and Jaeger gave me multiple bite wounds. The last four nights I've been at the emergency room getting antibiotics dribbled into my arm.
Tucker:  I've had to do that too, you know.
mr_ed:  But not because I bit you!
Tucker:  Gripe, gripe, gripe. At least Jaeger's gone.
mr_ed:  Yes, I took him to the MaxFund shelter on Saturday, and they approved Lisa and Lila's application, and I went back on Sunday to say good-bye and see him off to his new home.
Tucker:  You took puppy that day, too.


mr_ed:  Yes, I took Mystique to the shelter that day and left her.
Tucker:  That was a nice, quiet night!
mr_ed:  You looked more relaxed, but I sure wasn't. The poor little thing has spent the last seven months running in a yard and sleeping on a bed and having company all day. I just couldn't leave her in a kennel in a noisy shelter.
Tucker:  ::snort::  So she's going to stay here?
mr_ed:  Just until we find a home for her. MaxFund will list her on their website, and people who fall in love with her beautiful, smart cuteness will contact us to meet her.


Tucker:  She's bugging me right now.
mr_ed:  But she's doing it cutely.
Tucker:  ::snarl::
mr_ed:  Do you need a pill?
Tucker:  Treat.
mr_ed:  Okay, then it's off to beddie-bye for all of us.
Tucker:  No pill, just treat.
mr_ed:  No promises, just what I think's best.
Tucker:  ::sigh::  Why do dogs have to depend on humans?
mr_ed:  Dunno, bunky. How's peanut butter sound?
Tucker:  It sounds like a jar opening.
mr_ed:  Let's go check.

Miscellany

mr_ed:  In an effort to post something - anything - so that another day doesn't go by blogless, I'm going to toss out some random stuff
Tucker:  You took Jaeger away.
mr_ed:  Well, yes. And that's not random, just something I didn't want to take time to get into. Jaeger's on what MaxFund calls a trial adoption. He's a sweet, sweet, good dog, and we hope his new home works out.
Tucker:  Good dog, no. Works out, yes.
mr_ed:  The 10 most popular names given to cats and dogs (in the U.S.?) have been announced by an insurance company.
Tucker:  You don't give your animals popular names. So we're not popular.
mr_ed:  I don't know who named you Tucker, but it wasn't me. Happy 100th birthday to UPS, which started out (according to Wikipedia) as mainly a Seattle opium delivery service.
Tucker:  And then there's Starbucks.
mr_ed:  Right. Seattle has spawned at least two drug-delivery businesses. Happy 56th birthday to (Melvin) Wayne Osmond, older brother of Donnie and Marie and one of the original Osmond Brothers singers.
Tucker:  Any famous people?
mr_ed:  Donald O'Connor, star of the Francis the Talking Mule movies.
Tucker:  Eh.
mr_ed:  Count Tolstoy? Ben Gazzara? Jack Black?
Tucker:  ::shrug::
mr_ed:  Roger Tory Peterson?
Tucker:  Inventor of the field guide?
mr_ed:  Mmm, yeah, I guess you could say that.
Tucker:  He was a genius!
mr_ed:  Oh?
Tucker:  When Siberian Huskies move to a new area, they need to know what animals to chase.
mr_ed:  Don't you just chase everything?
Tucker:  When we get home we have to tell the others about it.
mr_ed:  Oh noble hunter, can't you just show them the carcass? (If you catch it, of course.)
Tucker:  ::scowl::  There's usually not enough left.
mr_ed:  Ah.
Tucker:  And if there was, somedoggy else would run up and try to take it, and it would get all torn up, and then everydoggy would have it.
mr_ed:  And what's the point of that?
Tucker:  Right. We couldn't fight over it that way.
mr_ed:  But if you ... never mind. Today is also the anniversary of the first publication of Scientific American magazine. Which keeps us informed about genetics. Which is interesting.
Tucker:  ::yawn::  I'm going to sleep now. Sweet dreams.
mr_ed:  AND this is the anniversary of the "I have a dream" speech on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial by Martin Luther King, Jr., Ph.D.
Tucker:  
mr_ed:  Tucker?
Tucker:  
mr_ed:  Okay, good night then.

More moves coming

Tucker:  Don't be mad at me. Jaeger attacked me!
mr_ed:  But I'm the one who's bleeding.
Tucker:  You shouldn't have been in the middle.
mr_ed:  I was sitting on the floor and you two started fighting around me.
Tucker:  Jaeger did! He jumped in the air, bounced off the stove, and was going to body slam me and bite me!
mr_ed:  That sounds pretty dramatic, but it's not what happened.
Tucker:  Well he attacked me!
mr_ed:  Because...?
Tucker:  For no reason! He just attacked!
mr_ed:  What were you doing at the time?
Tucker:  Minding my own business!
mr_ed:  Which was...?
Tucker:  I was eating.
mr_ed:  Mmmhmm. Whose food?
Tucker:  I don't remember. Mine, probably. You give me food, I eat my food.
mr_ed:  Which is in another room. And when you're done with that, you try to eat puppy's food, right?
Tucker:  Sometimes.
mr_ed:  And I was sitting right there and told you no, didn't I?
Tucker:  And you pushed me! And then Jaeger attacked me!
mr_ed:  Sounds like he was defending either me or Mystique and her food, doesn't it?
Tucker:  He wanted puppy's food! He attacked me! He barked, "MINE !"
mr_ed:  Only two dogs eat puppy's food - one is little and black, and the other is overweight and has blue eyes.
Tucker:  ::scowl::  I have to think about that one.
mr_ed:  Well anyway, you've made Jaeger's life so miserable that he's moving this weekend.
Tucker:  Me?
mr_ed:  He won't come out of the bedroom during the day. I have to escort him past your roadblock so he can go outside and come back in.
Tucker:  He's been waiting.
mr_ed:  For what?
Tucker:  He's been hiding because he knows he couldn't just come after me. He had to have you there. To save him.
mr_ed:  Good grief.
Tucker:  So you're sending him away. But you're blaming me.
mr_ed:  He's not afraid of Gremlin, or me or the puppy.
Tucker:  Where are you sending him?
mr_ed:  To the shelter, probably, at least for a few days. I also want the shelter people to pressure the clinic people to find out why he's limping. It's been 11 or 12 weeks, and now it's worse.
Tucker:  Do you still blame me?
mr_ed:  Oh, probably not. If it's his shoulder and if he has bone grinding against bone, I don't suppose that's something that you could have done to him. But the timing was suspicious.
Tucker:  I didn't do it.
mr_ed:  ::shrug::
Tucker:  Are you sending away puppy too?
mr_ed:  Probably not tomorrow, but probably soon. She won't be a puppy much longer, and adopters do like to get puppies.
Tucker:  She's getting a little nicer.
mr_ed:  Less puppy-brained, more mature. Yeah.
Tucker:  That will be good. Just us.
mr_ed:  You snark at Gremlin sometimes, too.
Tucker:  I can't help it. Sometimes other dogs just bug me.
mr_ed:  I know, punkin. I wish I knew why, though.  ::sigh::  It's like you're irritable because you're hurting, or something.
Tucker:  I'm not bugging them. They're bugging me.
mr_ed:  I know, I know.  ::nose smooch::
Tucker:  ::snort::  ::lick own nose::  What was that for?
mr_ed:  I love you, Grumpy Bear. Hey, you know what time it is?
Tucker:  Treat, treat, treat, gimme treat!
mr_ed:  And then I'm off to bed.
Tucker:  Wooo!  Treat!

A taste of the Big Apple

Tucker:  We haven't been blogging.
mr_ed:  No, I've been awfully tired at night.
Tucker:  Not from taking care of us!
mr_ed:  One errand was to buy dog food and a couple of extra bowls because I thought we'd have guests for a few days.
Tucker:  Puppy's human and his friend and her son?
mr_ed:  Two dogs that were living at puppy's human's house.
Tucker:  No more dogs!
mr_ed:  They're sweet girls, and you might have had more dogs to dominate. Mystique didn't even try to bug them very much. Want to see some pictures?
Tucker:  No.
mr_ed:  Don't worry. Looking at their pictures won't make them suddenly appear.

Puppy Mystique and Puppy Masei

Puppy Mystique and Grizz

Tucker:  I remember them. So where did they go?
mr_ed:  ::shrug::  I don't know. Their people said they'd call me, but they didn't.
Tucker:  At least we have more food. Is puppy going back now?
mr_ed:  Her human moved to New York today. Or to New Jersey by way of New York, or something.
Tucker:  So puppy is going there?
mr_ed:  No, his plans were still up in the air. Even after the plane landed.
Tucker:  ::snort::  Have you ever been there?
mr_ed:  New York City? The Big Apple?
Tucker:  Why go there for that? We have apples in the back yard. They're little, but there are lots of them.
mr_ed:  I didn't go for apples, but yes, I've been there a few times. I had to see for myself who's buried in Grant's Tomb!
Tucker:  Mrs. Grant.
mr_ed:  Grumpy Bear speaks truth! How did you know?
Tucker:  Haven't you ever heard of tele ... ummm ... commu  ::frown::  nications?
mr_ed:  I even have some textbooks on the subject. But I didn't know about your polysyllabicity.
Tucker:  ::suspicious look::  Are you trying to talk over my head?
mr_ed:  You're on the floor and I'm in a chair. I am talking over your head.
Tucker:  Anyway. You don't have to go there to know there.
mr_ed:  Good point! Which allows me to mention Overheard in New York, snippets of conversation heard in passing and posted for all to enjoy. For example, recent entries about dogs and telecommunications go:

It'd Be Goodbye, Valtrex

Dog owner to pup bugging drunk girl: Heel, dog, heel.
Drunk girl's friend: Oh my god, what if that dog could actually heal you?!

-- Outside Plug Uglies
   Overheard by: Starkie


It's Funny, Though -- She Never Calls

Bimbette: Yeah, me and Beyoncé is friends on MySpace. She invites me to all the hot events, like her concerts and parties. She even bulletins me.
Boyfriend: For real?
Bimbette: Yeah, we's like best friends.

-- Shuttle to Times Square
   Overheard by: Is not friends with Beyonce :(


mr_ed:  I could read Overheard in New York all night - and almost did once.


The Game -- 'Gaining Control by Withholding Information'

Father: Do you have to pee?
Son: No.
Father: Do you have to poo?
Son: Maybe.
Father: It kind of matters.

-- Restroom, Barnes & Noble, Union Square
   Overheard by: Jon A.


At Least for the Rabbit
Hipster: Why you wearin' such a big hat?
Junkie wearing top hat: It's not just a hat -- it's a port-a-potty.

--E Houston near Broadway
   Overheard by: Big Larry


Wednesday Wrote the Book on One-Liners

Dude: Are those people speaking sign language? That would be really cool... Although, there wouldn't be much point in them coming to a bookstore, unless they're in the braille section...

-- Barnes & Noble


Dr. Frankenstein's Wednesday One-Liners

Bimbette: Like, I totally starting choking. Something got stuck in my coccyx. It was bad.

-- College Walk, Columbia University
   Overheard by: DD

Crazy old man, pointing and yelling at little kid: Your skin is on backwards! Don't be naive!

-- Washington Square Park
   Overheard by: tj


mr_ed:  For readers who are naive (about street talk, anyway), please be aware that a huge portion of  Overheard in New York may be offensive (even more than the discussion of poo) due to topics and language that are vulgar, racist, or lifestyle-oriented. That's life in the big city!


Wednesday One-Liners Are One of the Properties of a Metal

Conductor: While you are waiting for trains, please do not sit on the edge of the platform. Not only could you lose your legs, but you could delay your fellow passengers.

-- Long Beach-bound LIRR
   Overheard by: Matt P.

Conductor: The next stop is North White Plains, and everyone needs to get off there because the train will be aborted to the train yard. Yes, the train yard... And you don't want to be at the train yard. It is a dark and lonely place...

-- Metro-North

Conductor: This is the Six local train. Next stop is 42nd, Grand Central. And remember, folks, if you're having a bad day, don't try to have a good one. That's just impossible. Next stop, 42nd.

-- 6 train
   Overheard by: freckles

Conductor: Once again, ladies and gentlemen, today is July 31st. November monthly tickets are no longer valid on this train.

-- LIRR
   Overheard by: Does that mean I can use my December ticket?

Conductor: This is the voice of your conductor. Remember, only I can move the train. [Pauses while train begins moving, then] See? Just like that.

-- A train
   Overheard by: McF.

Conductor: I wish you would stop sticking your head out through the doors. If you want to be the conductor, take the test. Then you can stick your head out all you damn well please.

-- 7 train, Queensboro Plaza
   Overheard by: ProcrastYNate

Conductor: This is the Q local. An express train is right across the platform. [Doors close] Wave goodbye!

-- Q train
   Overheard by: Zvi


via Overheard in New York

Wrong time, wrong place

Tucker:  Can't you read?
mr_ed:  Usually.
Tucker:  But you took Jaeger on the wrong day.
mr_ed:  That I did. Her emails said "Monday," and I saw "Sunday." But I'm pretty sure that I went to the right place.
Tucker:  But he got an extra ride.  ::pout::
mr_ed:  True, I suppose. But you got a ride you didn't need on Saturday. And the vet's receptionist gave you treats.
Tucker:  And I didn't get a shot or anything.
mr_ed:  Nope.
Tucker:  It would be funny if you took puppy instead of Jaeger.
mr_ed:  ::smile::  The woman might notice that Mystique doesn't weigh 55 pounds. Maybe I could take both of them. But it's supposed to be Jaeger and Lila meeting without other distractions.
Tucker:  Is puppy going away yet?
mr_ed:  Her human said he isn't keeping her, so we can start on finding her a new home.
Tucker:  Good. Why were you out so late tonight?
mr_ed:  Ehhh, long story. The police thought I was buying drugs, and four or five of them wanted to chat with me about it.
Tucker:  Was it scary?
mr_ed:  No, just kinda tiresome that they didn't want to believe me. There was a moment when they wondered why I had "mace" in my pocket.
Tucker:  You told them it wasn't?
mr_ed:  Yeah, I told them it was citronella spray to break up my dogs. I guess having leashes and dog food in the back seat helped them with that one.
Tucker:  I don't see the spray now. Where is it?
mr_ed:  They said they tossed it in the back seat. They didn't say whose back seat, and I didn't see it. Maybe when the sun is out I'll find it. Meantime, don't start any fights.
Tucker:  Me?
mr_ed:  Okay, don't get into any fights. Until I can find it or buy some more.
Tucker:  Me?
mr_ed:  Well I'm not the one with the hole healing up on his nose.
Tucker:  That's Jaeger.
mr_ed:  And...?
Tucker:  Puppy.
mr_ed:  Hers is all healed. And I'm not talking about Gremlin. So who does that leave? Who has a pink flesh-colored spot next to his liver-colored nose?
Tucker:  That's not fair! Everydoggy else has black noses.
mr_ed:  If the shoe fits....
Tucker:  Chew it? That's what puppy does. Even when the shoe doesn't fit her.
mr_ed:  ::sigh::  True. Too much to worry about tonight. I'll try to remember to put my boots up someplace so she can't take the insoles out, but I'm pretty tired and need to go to bed now.
Tucker:  You haven't given us our bedtime treats yet.
mr_ed:  I remember giving Gremlin her medicine wrapped in sliced turkey - you wouldn't have missed out on that.
Tucker:  Musta missed it, musta missed it, musta missed it.
mr_ed:  I'm not that asleep, and neither were you. Go to bed now.
Tucker:  Okay.
mr_ed:  Okay. Good night.
Tucker:  I'm going to dream about turkey slices.
mr_ed:  You won't be hungry for breakfast.
Tucker:  Dream on!
mr_ed:  Ciao!
Tucker:  Chow!

Comings and goings

Tucker:  Did you go to the shelter today?
mr_ed:  Sure did. I went to see Bo the coonhound, but he's already been adopted!
Tucker:  Good. Too many dogs here already. So who did you smell like when you got home?


mr_ed:  The deaf and blind puppies, Helen and Tommy.
Tucker:  No puppies! No deaf and blind! They would bump into me all the time.
mr_ed:  Actually, I know Helen can hear a little, and she might be able to see a little too. And how could they miss the scent of your handsome Huskiness?
Tucker:  Well.... No puppies.

mr_ed:  Awww ... you like Mystique. Admit it!
Tucker:  That isn't our yard. That was before she came to live here. And bother me all the time. And I'm scowling. See?
mr_ed:  Sure.
Tucker:  You sent her away. Why is she back now?
mr_ed:  Her human can't take care of her for a few days.
Tucker:  A few days. And then she's gone?
mr_ed:  We'll see. Maybe a few days and you'll be playing with her - who knows?
Tucker:  ::scowl::
mr_ed:  Did you see Jaeger wagging his tail when Mystique came in and jumped on him right away? He was happy to see her! And she jumps on him all the time. Chews his ears, bites his tail. Actually, she's doing less of that now. Growing up, I think. Anyway, it wouldn't hurt you to play with her a little.
Tucker:  Gremlin doesn't.
mr_ed:  Gremlin's older than you are, and she's not one of those playful Siberians that we hear about so much.
Tucker:  I'm not either.  ::scowl::  See?  ::scowl::
mr_ed:  Tomorrow Jaeger is meeting someone who might adopt him.
Tucker:  That would be good.
mr_ed:  Maybe. If Mystique's Uncle Jaeger leaves, she might start jumping all over Uncle Tucker!
Tucker:  Woooo is me. And her!
mr_ed:  We'll see what happens. I need to hurry to bed so I'll be awake to take Jaeger to meet Lila and her human.
Tucker:  I will wake you up.
mr_ed:  Good. Thank you!
Tucker:  Thank you !
mr_ed:  I thank you more.
Tucker:  I thank you even more.
mr_ed:  More than that!
Tucker:  The most in the whole world!
mr_ed:  Whew! That's a lot! See you in the morning, then!

Guy talk

Tucker:  Are there any girl Siberians at MaxFund?
mr_ed:  A little puppy that's in a foster home.
Tucker:  Oh.
mr_ed:  Why?
Tucker:  Don't want any puppies again.
mr_ed:  But you want a girl Sibe?
Tucker:  Well ... Amber is pretty cute. I like that third picture.
mr_ed:  In the second one, Zim reminds me of a picture I have of you.
Tucker:  Picture of me? Where? Where?
Tucker:  Zot and Sally.
mr_ed:  You couldn't decide which girl was bugging you more. Are you sure you want another one living here again?
Tucker:  It would be different with a Sibe girl.
mr_ed:  Possibly.
Tucker:  I'll sleep on it.
mr_ed:  Good idea! Good night, punkin.
Tucker:  No puppiezzzZZZzzz

Time wounds all heels

mr_ed:  And it's sure been beating me up. I'm having such trouble getting things done! Arrgh! My apologies to Sibernet folks for taking my post from there and putting it here ... but it takes me so long to write and I just have to get back to something like a normal schedule!

Someone asked about treating a bite wound on a dog. It didn't sound like a serious injury, and the consensus seemed to be to keep the wound clean with soap and water. And for dog's sake don't use peroxide! It's been proven that peroxide does more harm than good.

Some day I'd like to track down that proof and see if it's in the form of one or more valid scientific experiments. I'm not from Missouri (the "Show me" state) - I just hold proofs to pretty high standards.   :-)

In the meantime, a couple of web articles were cited, and one kind of bugged me just a little. And when you combine that with my unmanageable drive to turn anything simple into something more complex, you get a semi-long reply about wound care. That went something like this....

> Do not use an ointment that contains neomycin, because it can irritate the skin.

Tell you what. Neomycin has never irritated me, but most nurses do.   ;-)   Personality clashes. I believe in fully-informed choices, but the idea seems kind of foreign to most nurses.   :-)

> Clean the area with soap and water twice daily....

You'll have to look hard to find true soaps anymore. You're usually using a detergent with a bunch of other chemicals thrown in. As someone said, "it can irritate the skin." Fully-informed choices.   ;-)

I'm aggressive with wounds, in part because I'm diabetic and my own wounds can get infected and out of control quickly. A hole in the skin is a break in the body's first, best defense against foreign stuff that's everywhere, just waiting for the chance to build up quickly and take over.

So my approach is to keep the bad-guy population as low as possible in the area of the wound. Peroxide kills healthy cells? So does infection. Fully-informed choices.   ;-)

My "wound treatment protocol" depends on the length and depth of the wound, its location, how clean it can be kept, whether the animal eats the dressings, how squirrely they are while treating it, their overall health, and whether they're getting antibiotics.

I believe in flushing a soaped-up wound like it's the next Great Flood. I just don't like leaving that stuff on and in the skin. If I can't rinse it off well, I don't like soap.

If it's on a leg, and they're waving the leg around to keep me from working on it, I'll soap it the first time, but I may flush it with an antiseptic liquid most times after that. Iodine, alcohol, peroxide, dilute bleach. Hypochlorite only - no whiteners or brighteners.   :-)

(I know, OMG!, bleach is like nuking the healthy skin!  It's a specialized tool. Like when feces get smeared on a wound. If you use it and tell a doctor, call it Dakin's Solution.)

I like syringes to control how much liquid I use and where it goes. A vet can sell you one that has a narrow, curved tip. They really help for flushing out punctures. They work with plain water,
too!   :-)

Weepy wounds can benefit from drying-out procedures.

For fairly superficial wounds, mild heat applied to the area a couple of times a day helps improve blood flow and healing.

Punctures through all the layers of skin and down into fat or muscle are where I for sure say a visit with a doctor is necessary. They can clean and debride it better than you can, and then check for deeper damage and install drains if needed.

Well, shoot. I didn't mean to ramble on about what seemed like a simple question. Ummm ... fully-informed choices.   :-)

And that was after trimming some here and there.   :-)   Debriding it a little, you might say. Although probably not.

Tucker says Howwwdy! He hopes that everdoggy is having good dreams!

Bo actually does know

Tucker:  What's a bo?
mr_ed:  As in rokushakubō? Six-foot martial arts staff?
Tucker:  No.
mr_ed:  Ficus religiosa, the sacred tree under which Buddha found enlightenment?
Tucker:  No, not that.
mr_ed:  Bo Jackson? Bo Derek? Bo Diddley?
Tucker:  Who?
mr_ed:  Who's on first. Jackson played outfield.
Tucker:  A bo at MaxFund?
mr_ed:  Oh... Bo!
Tucker:  That's what I said!
mr_ed:  Naturally!
Tucker:  Okay. So who is Bo at MaxFund?
mr_ed:  He's a cool young boy that looks - to me - like a mix of Redbone Coon Hound and Bluetick Coonhound.
Tucker:  What's a coonhound?
mr_ed:  You know what a hound is?
Tucker:  A dog that chases animals. Big deal. Siberian Huskies do that and pull sleds.
mr_ed:  Well, that's true. But hounds may have better noses than Sibes.
Tucker:  ::Hmpf::
mr_ed:  Anyway, the first hounds in America could track and chase animals well, but they got confused when the animal would escape up a tree.
Tucker:  That's kinda dumb.
mr_ed:  Escaping up a tree?
Tucker:  Not figuring it out.
mr_ed:  Every breed has its strengths and its limitations.
Tucker:  Not Sibes.
mr_ed:  Your fluffy coats aren't good for running through brush.
Tucker:  ::Hmpf::
mr_ed:  So treeing hounds were developed.
Tucker:  Just to chase raccoons?
mr_ed:  No, no. Also much bigger animals like bears and mountain lions.
Tucker:  Big kitties. So Bo does that?
mr_ed:  Probably not. At least, I doubt that he had training on how to hunt with people.
Tucker:  You don't need humans to chase animals. You just do it.
mr_ed:  Instinct. True. But people take hounds along and let them chase animals because the people want in on the hunt too.
Tucker:  So what's the big deal with Bo?
mr_ed:  Someone came to MaxFund this week to see how well he could track. To check his instinct.
Tucker:  They brought raccoons?
mr_ed:  No, of course not.
Tucker:  Bears? Mountain lions?
mr_ed:  No, the woman trains dogs to track people.
Tucker:  People climb trees to escape? Human claws are pretty useless.
mr_ed:  Dogs that track people can be any kind that naturally follows a scent very well. They don't have to be treeing hounds - it just happens that Bo is that kind.
Tucker:  Okay, so what?
mr_ed:  She liked how well Bo did. In fact, in the report that she wrote up on him, she said, "Every now and then, a dog comes along with such incredible natural talent, that all training is nearly always successful – Bo is such a dog."
Tucker:  How nice for him.
mr_ed:  It is if it helps him get a home! She also mentioned him on the website of the American Scent Hound Association and wrote that he's a "top drawer tracking candidate."
Tucker:  I hope he finds a home. What does he look like?
mr_ed:  Besides the picture? Kinda like Jaeger with long ears.
Tucker:  Don't bring him here.
mr_ed:  Maybe Bo and Jaeger would have fun playing together. Maybe you'd like Bo.
Tucker:  I hope they both find homes. Just not this one.
mr_ed:  You're a grumpus.
Tucker:  Gimme a treat.
mr_ed:  Maybe I should give you sugar to sweeten you up.
Tucker:  Yeah!  Woooo!  What's sugar?
mr_ed:  Something neither of our overweight bodies need. I don't think I even have any in the house.
Tucker:  You could go get some! I'll go in the crate if you give me a treat!
mr_ed:  How about we all just go to sleep?
Tucker:  ::sigh::  Not as good. But that would be my second choice.
mr_ed:  Okay, big red. Goodnight.
Tucker:  ::ZZZzzzzz::

Another dog locked in a car

mr_ed:  Three weeks ago I got outraged by Sacramento animal-control officers who could have taken an overheated dog out of a car but didn't do so until the dog was dead. I also didn't care for how the department handled the publicity. Here's a story that's unfolding a little differently.

Tre Smith, a Toronto animal-welfare officer, broke a Rottie out of a car just in time. "[E]quipment showed the temperature inside to be around 70 C [158° F]." Cyrus was very near death.

This time it didn't take long to find the owner - he ran outside when he heard his car alarm. He was allegedly angry and abusive (some reports say there was an altercation), and the investigator handcuffed him to his (the owner's) car so the non-breathing dog could be treated at the scene, and when that didn't help, rushed to an emergency room.

Police were on the way but hadn't arrived yet. A spokesman for the Toronto Humane Society said Smith left "no less than five of the man's friends watching over him." And yet Paul Soderholm got a bit of vigilante justice from bystanders before the cops arrived.

I've looked at more than a dozen news stories and press releases, and all that I've found is that Soderholm "was bleeding," which can mean lots of different things. Of course I'm more interested in how Cyrus is doing than I am in his owner. But I'd like to know a little bit about the guy's condition because it's the jumping-off point for part two of this story.

This just in ... from a video it looks like a nosebleed.

Smith is employed by the Toronto Humane Society, which "vigorously" defends his actions. But his authority to investigate animal welfare comes from the Ontario SPCA in the form of an individual license. And "[T]he individual's Agent status under the Ontario SPCA Act has been temporarily suspended, pending the outcome of an Ontario SPCA internal review."

So Smith is still working for, and paid by, Toronto HS. But for now he can't investigate animal cruelty.

Depending on when you asked the OSPCA about the investigation,

• "[A]llegations have surfaced surrounding the officer's actions during the response." (August 8); or
• "This is a review of the officer's conduct after the rescue was made and whether that conduct was appropriate." (August 10); or
• The investigation "will only be determining whether the investigator, Tre Smith, followed procedures." (August 11).

I'm okay with a suspended license and an investigation. As a press release said, "This is similar to what police services do."

I've watched tons of Perry Mason, Dragnet, Adam-12, ... Kojak, Baretta, Hill Street Blues, ... Cagney and Lacy, Walker Texas Ranger, Nash Bridges ... oh yeah, and Mod Squad. So I'm thinking that Soderholm was legally in custody the whole time he was handcuffed to his car. (You're either "free to go" or in custody ... isn't that how it works?) And so he was injured while in custody.

And so (1) the good citizens of Toronto should know why people get injured in custody, and (2) he's going to sue, so somebody had better cover their behinds.

(I'm assuming that even though I've been led to believe that Canadians are much more laissez-faire and forgiving about the odd personal transgression, a man angry about his car getting busted into, about his dog being taken, and about whatever else, is going to be angry enough to sue.)

But here's where things get "hinky," to use some of that police jargon I've picked up. I may be wrong - there may be answers to these questions that I've missed or they may be the wrong questions - but I'm really wondering:

• Why did it take a week (July 31 to August 8) for the OSPCA to decide to do a ho-hum, it's-just-routine, "similar-to-what-police-services-do" investigation?
• Why did Smith have to learn about his suspension from email that was sent to (if I counted right) 149 animal-welfare people in Ontario?
• Why are people in charge such flaming twits, even when they know they're under scrutiny?

This was in the email sent to about 149 people by the CEO of the OSPCA:

Suspension Notice

As many of you are aware, an Ontario SPCA Agent employed by the Toronto Humane Society recently received extensive media coverage while resopnding to a dog in a hot car report.

While the Ontario SPCA commends the Agent for taking the necessary actions to secure the safety of the animal....

Email from OSPCA Chief Inspector to TV news:

I started working in animal welfare in 1977 and in those over 30 years of doing the job, I have personally rescued many animals in similar and much worse situations.

Except for that paragraph, the rest of the email was also posted on the Ontario SPCA website. It continues:

As Chief Inspector, I am responsible for the conduct of our investigators and I take that responsibility very seriously. It's key to our accountability as an organization and it's crucial to the Ontario SPCA operating in a manner that earns and maintains the public's trust and confidence.

Is Officer Smith a hero for saving the life of "Cyrus" the dog - ABSOLUTELY - but so are our 170+ cruelty officers across Ontario that do exactly that, day after day.

Okay, I'm picking nits with twits. These people just sound sanctimonioius and self-serving to me, and I don't think they need to. But that's their loss, if any.

I'll bet there isn't a procedure for Smith to have followed that covers this incident very well. Dunno.  ::shrug::  I'll also bet that they'll say Smith should have uncuffed Soderholm right before he slipped in his vehicle and sped away. From this distance it's impossible to tell whether that was possible, though.

As for Cyrus, it sounds like he has recovered well, but the Toronto Humane Society hasn't updated his status since last week. We'll keep our fingers and toes crossed here.


SOURCES

7/31 - citynews.ca - good initial report, day of rescue
7/31 - Toronto Humane Society - initial report, day of rescue
8/1 - toronto.ctv.ca - overview
8/2 - Toronto Humane Society - follow-up
8/7 - Toronto Humane Society - "What a Difference A Week Makes"
8/8 - email from Ontario SPCA CEO announcing Smith's suspension
8/9 - citynews.ca
8/10 - citynews.ca - OSPCA responds to criticism + email from OSPCA Chief Inspector
8/10 - press release, OSPCA Chief Inspector
8/10 - The Globe and Mail - good follow-up
8/11 - latest from the Toronto Humane Society
8/11 - thestar.com
8/12 - thestar.com - "It seems public sentiment for Smith in cyberspace is growing."
8/12 - itchmo.com

# 100

Tucker:  ::singing::  Oye ¿Como Va?
mr_ed:  Hey, it's Santana Sibe!
Tucker:  It's too early for Santa.
mr_ed:  Na. Santana. Na, na, na.
Tucker:  Sha Na Na. Rock and roll is here to stay.
mr_ed:  Yeah, and we're on our way to Woodstock. Anyhow, this is blog #100, and it came super-fast thanks to all those posts during Blogathon.
Tucker:  Where are we going?
mr_ed:  We're going to bed soon. It's getting awfully late....
Tucker:  It's too late baby, yeah it's too late.
mr_ed:  ... and I was in the middle of writing something that was turning out to be kind of long....
Tucker:  My baby wrote me a letter.
mr_ed:  Stick a cork in it!
Tucker:  Gimme a treat.
mr_ed:  No.
Tucker:  I'm leavin' on a jet plane.
mr_ed:  Ha.
Tucker:  Country roads, take me home.
mr_ed:  Misty taste of moonshine? You a little bit Rocky Mountain high? Took a trip and never left the farm?
Tucker:  You said we were going somewhere. Where the woods talk.
mr_ed:  That sounds scary.
Tucker:  Like the Ents, maybe. But I don't know any Ent songs.
mr_ed:  Got no time to for spreadin roots,
Tucker:  The time has come to be gone.
mr_ed:  And though our health we drank a thousand times,
Tucker:  It's time to ramble on.
mr_ed:  G'night. And good luck with Gollum in your dreams!

Feeding the pack

mr_ed:  I just posted some notes about nutrition on the online forum that MaxFund volunteers use. Minky, you guys don't have to read it twice.  :-)  Rather than staying up way late thinking of something else to write here....
Tucker:  Like where is puppy?
mr_ed:  (She went home.)  ... I'm going to cheat and just crosspost what I wrote there.
Tucker:  Cheaters can't be wieners.
mr_ed:  And wieners never cheat. I know. Brat.
Tucker:  Did you call me a name?
mr_ed:  No, no, I was just giving an example of a wiener.

Someone was trying to sort out everything she'd heard about cat nutrition from vets ... their recommendations to stick with large brands because of the research the companies do, and to avoid taking anything on the internet seriously. So I wrote:

I did a boat-load of reading about nutrition after the first phase of contamination this year, and I for sure changed what I feed the pack here. (Yes, they're dogs, but my impression is that these particular points are the same for cats - only slightly more so.) My conclusions are:

• No more grains;
• It's about ingredients, not brands;
• Corporate research is not scientific research;
• DVMs (and MDs) are practitioners, not scientists;
  • and don't have time to keep current with science;
  • unless they deliberately put effort into it;
  • and going to manufacturers' seminars doesn't count;
  • (so where does their "knowledge" about raw come from?)
• No more grains;
• Ingredients labels can be very misleading;
  • but can be decoded, pretty much;
  • the better the brand, the less decoding is needed;
• Kibble requires carbs to hold together;
• Carnivores don't, particularly;
• Rotate so they don't get the same add-ons all the time;
• Canned food can be great (sorry for the pun); and
• No more grains.

Having said that, half of the first meal of the day for my pack on Sunday was a food with grain. NOT corn, wheat, or rice - these are the most abused by manufacturers, in my opinion. This one has rye, barley, and oats. They don't get it often, and I have a handful of reasons (or rationalizations ;-) ) as to why I feed it, but I don't need to burden youse guys with that.

Tucker:  Can Jaeger go home too?
mr_ed:  We have to find him a new one. Until then, this is his home.
Tucker:  It's my home.
mr_ed:  Mine too, but we're big-hearted guys. We can share.
Tucker:  ::annoyed::  I'm going to bed now on my kitchen floor and nodoggy better try to get past me.
mr_ed:  Sweet dreams, Billy Goat Gruff.
Tucker:  Don't rub my tummy, gimme treaZZZzzzzz

Blogathon stuffies

Tucker: Here I am again wearing a MaxFund tee shirt. Why? Because people who donated to MaxFund (after making a pledge during Blogathon 2007) get prizes! The Human Assistant is working hard to arrange that.

Here are the donations and premiums again:

• $10 to $23.99 - Teenie Beanie
• $24 to $47.99 - Beanie Baby
• $48 and up - Classic Beanie
• highest two, $100 or more - jumbo stuffed animal

Also, there are Beanie Babies for trivia-question answerers!

If we owe you a premium, please email us your address (ed@maxfundvolunteers.org). Also remind us if you are on SIBERNET. The Human Assistant will have the stuffies that you can choose from sorted out soon. He apologizes for not being up to taking care of it sooner!

I gotta get him tucked in now or he won't get to feeling any better.

Don't trust TOO much!

Tucker:  The Human Assistant thanks everydoggy for their good wishes. He is feeling better. He needs to go to bed earlier. He should be asleep now, but I am letting him type a short note for me.

It sounds like dokkers led a family to think their Great Dane would have about four puppies. Ha ha . She had 16. Different news stories have different pictures. Don't trust dokkers TOO much.

Jaeger neither. The H.A. put the puppy and me in our crates and gave everydoggy treats and went out to the car. I saw Jaeger in the front yard and sounded the alarm. He had escaped!

At first H.A. thought Jaeger must have squeezed out the door along with him. That's how tired he was! He thought he hadn't noticed. So H.A. brought him back in and gave everydoggy treats again and went back out.

He was looking for a pushed-out window screen when Jaeger came running around the house to the front again. He looked so happy!  Grrr.  H.A. figured out Jaeger went out the back door and over the side fence. So he brought the escapee in again and closed the back door and gave everydoggy treats again.

That part wasn't so bad. But now H.A. has to be thinking about when Jaeger will try to escape again. Maybe he just wanted to go with H.A. But who knows. I knew that we couldn't trust Jaeger TOO much!